Peter Sagal's Rules of Twitter

Peter Sagal is a radio host, writer, and humorist. Here are his ten rules of Twitter:

In response to narrowly spread demand, here are my Rules of Twitter. Note that each was learned by violating it repeatedly over the years, so don't bother going back in my feed to find contradictions... trust me, I know. pic.twitter.com/QtzhBkx9LP

— @petersagal.bsky.social (@petersagal) October 25, 2021

Since tweets have a habit of disappearing, I’ve transcribed the ten rules below:

1. You will and have regretted many tweets. You will never regret not tweeting.
2. Is it intended to delight, inform, or amuse? Then go ahead. If not, don’t.
3. Never argue with anybody about anything. Really.
4. …except pizza, whether hot dogs are sandwiches, and old movies/TV shows.
5. Don’t say anything about a piece of current art/writing/culture you wouldn’t say to the face of the person who created it.
6. Never promote any info or news unless it comes from a source you would trust to tell you which door the tiger is behind.
7. The only useful purpose of having a bigger platform than other people is to use it to benefit those other people, so boost and recommend widely.
8. Resist the common urge to engage with the one critic rather than the many fans.
9. Never, ever insult anyone personally. Mockery is fine, as long as it is aimed upwards.
10. To survive on the veldt, humans evolved to crave sugars and fats and to get energized by anger and fear. We don’t live on the veldt anymore. Refrain from feeding obsolete hungers.